Jim Caviezel

Let He who is without sin knit the first sweater:

Rand Paul

An evil black turtleneck, just like:

Has the conspiracy really been going on this long? Is it too late to stop it?

Bill Kristol

Hey there handsome, you're really drawing me in with that winning smile -- too bad that jacket is a clear giveaway you intend on offering my intestines to the demon prince Baal.

Bob Bennett

Utah's Bob Bennett is not evil, but rather sensitive, and tweedy:

No, wait, that's the wrong Bob Bennett:

Sorry for any supernatural injury that might have befallen you for believing for even a moment that Bob Bennett would not envelop you in his blackness if given even a moment's opportunity. Bob Bennett, consider your defeat vindicated. Evil.

Strom Thurmond and Strom Thurmond's Friend

What are you pointing at, Strom Thurmond? The approaching Dark One, who your professionally tailored suit has unleashed on the Earth?

Or are you pointing at your partner-in-black Lindsey Graham, who is "coincidentally" pointing right back at you?

To the Judas-iary Committee with you, Lindsey Graham. Evil.

Jerry Glanville

Is not evil! He is actually drawing evil to him with his shirt and pants, then exposing it to the light of God with his colorful belt buckle. Jerry Glanville is one of Jesus' very special heroes.

Mike Krzyzewski

Don't let his right-leaning quips about President Obama's poor handling of the economy fool you. Coack K is no Blue Devil, he is a Black Devil!

NCA-Evil!